April 06, 2010

You Have To Love The Onion

Pope Vows To Get Church Pedophilia Down To Acceptable Levels

VATICAN CITY—Calling the behavior shameful, sinful, and much more frequent than the Vatican was comfortable with, Pope Benedict XVI vowed this week to bring the widespread pedophilia within the Roman Catholic Church down to a more manageable level.

Addressing thousands gathered at St. Peter's Square on Easter Sunday, the pontiff offered his "most humble apologies" to abuse victims, and pledged to reduce the total number of molestations by 60 percent over the next five years.

Full Story Here


Univarn said...


Gives a whole new meaning to the 5-year plan :)

Artman2112 said...

hilarious but for the fact that in not so many words that is pretty much what the catholic church is really saying about all this.