August 31, 2009

Fuzzy death

Is your cat plotting to kill you?

Thanks to Joanne

He's baaaaaack....

Pissing off Jews, Muslims, and yours truly....it would appear that amateur magician Jesus Christ is back and ready for action.


Jesus of Siberia: The Russian ex-traffic policeman who claims he is the son of God
By Niall Firth

The beard and long hair are both present and correct.

And with his flowing linen robes and beatific smile he certainly does a fine impression of a holy man.

But to his believers in this remote corner of Siberia, Sergei Torop, a former traffic policeman, is the literal reincarnation of none other than Jesus Christ.

Torop, 48, is the spiritual leader of at least 5,000 devoted followers, among them intellectuals, artists and professionals who flock to worship him in the small isolated village of Petropavlovka - more than 2000 miles from Moscow.

Torop was ‘reborn’ as ‘Vissarion’ in 1991 just as Russia was facing a crisis of confidence following the collapse of the iron curtain.

ACTUAL PHOTO

Starting the week off with a fresh scent....

August 28, 2009

Friday mix of links.

Friday mix of things that you really should be reading right about now.

What are you waiting for? Click on through and enjoy.....

From Monkey Muck comes this short but sweet and hilarious post about the always goofy and homophobic Catholics.

From Pharyngula comes great news about a completely stupid law that has been taken off the books in ol' Kentucky.

Edward Copeland blogs about Woody Allen's masterpiece Manhattan.

Austin Cline asks why interracial marriage is a right but gay marriage is a threat.

Joanne posts a great song for you to listen to every dang day.

And finally......a picture of an anteater. Enjoy your weekend.


Denial

From The Pew Forum via the always fantastic blog Pharygula


When asked what they would do if scientists were to disprove a particular religious belief, nearly two-thirds (64%) of people say they would continue to hold to what their religion teaches rather than accept the contrary scientific finding, according to the results of an October 2006 Time magazine poll.

Ouch.

Tom Waits - Walk Away

It really doesn't get better than this folks. A little groove to kick off the weekend. Time to walk away and start over again...

August 27, 2009

New favorite

My new favorite website.....

http://www.peopleofwalmart.com/

Bible passage of the week....

Ezekial 23:19-21

Yet she became more and more promiscuous as she recalled the days of her youth, when she was a prostitute in Egypt. There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses. So you longed for the lewdness of your youth, when in Egypt your bosom was caressed and your young breasts fondled.

Saucy! And also kind of gross.

August 26, 2009

Very nice...

My kind of cinema.....


Parking love

Christian kids sent home from school....

Sure, these shirts are divisive, angry, and intolerant...and the kids wearing them SHOULD be sent home from school. Yet at the same time I have a very strange respect for Christians who at least know what the Bible says and aren't afraid to stick behind what it teaches.

The Bible strictly teaches that the only way to obtain salvation and get into heaven is
by accepting Jesus Christ as blah blah blah blah. To pretend that Christian theology is accepting of other belief systems is just wishy washy.

Of course, at the end of the day it is ALL absolute unfiltered bullshit. Of that we can be sure.

Yet I'm always strangely impressed by those who stick with the convictions set forth by a ancient anonymously authored text book that was written by folks who would have thought a wheelbarrow was an amazing piece of technology.



'Devil' shirts send kids home
By Christopher CurryStaff writer
Gainesville.com

More children from the Dove World Outreach Center arrived Tuesday at area public schools with shirts bearing the message "Islam is of the Devil" and were sent home for violation of the school district's dress code when they declined to change clothes or cover the anti-Muslim statement on their clothing.

School district staff attorney Tom Wittmer said the shirts violated a district ban on clothing that may "disrupt the learning process" or cause other students to be "offended or distracted."


"Students have a right of free speech, and we have allowed students to come to school wearing clothes with messages," Wittmer said. "But this message is a divisive message that is likely to offend students. Principals, I feel reasonably, have deemed that a violation of the dress code."

Full story here . . . .

Dean kills babies?

I knew that Howard Dean frequently killed kittens. Learned that
on the Internet.....so it has to be true.



I didn't know until today that he also kills babies.

August 24, 2009

Woo!

Hatred

This has to be seen to be believed.

Definite candidate for asshole of the year....

From the blog Pam's House Blend...

Arizona pastor's sermons call for execution of gays, Barney Frank and the President

Meet Pastor Steven Anderson of Faithful Word Baptist Church in Tempe, Arizona.....

"The sodomites are recruiters and you know who they are after? Your children. They are being recruited by the sodomites. They are being molested by the sodomites. They recruit through rape, they recruit through molestation, they recruit through violation"

"Our country is run by faggots. You know who was the man who was the architect of the bailout? His name is Barney Frank, he is a pedophile..."

"That's who just sold our country into fascism. That's who just sold our corporations to the government. That's who sold out our country, a faggot!"

"God Hates Barack Obama, I hate Barack Obama. I hate Him. God wants me to Hate Barack Obama." "Someone who commits murder should get the death penalty."

August 18, 2009

Lest we forget....

.....amongst all this award giving, back slapping, and general good will, that we are also here in Alphaville to poke fun at that most easy of targets......





Awards

Many thanks to Prof. Grebeard at the great blog Magic Carpet Burn for this very nice award. Glad to hear he is enjoying the daily dishes of vitriol here at Alphaville. Thanks prof!





....and also, in the same day I received this award....



from Wings at the equally entertaining blog Caffeinated Joe!


The honest scrap award comes with the stipulation that I pass this award on to 10 other blogs and then list 10 honest things about myself.....

So let's get started shall we....

10 Blogs that get the award....(leaving off Caffeinated Joe and Magic Carpet Burn because I just got something from them obviously....)

1. After The Bridge
2. Calvin's Canadian Cave of Coolness
3. From Homeless to Homeowner
4. Harnett-Hargrove
5. How Did I Get Here?
6. I Have Seen The Whole Of The Internet
7. Moot Point
8. Napier's News
9. Such Lovely Freckles
10. Vintage Macaroni


Whew......all of those are worthy and entertaining blogs that you should be checking out and adding to your reader of choice (which should be google reader, because that's what I use).

10 'honest' facts.....

1. My birthday is less than a week away.
2. A year ago at about this time I was in the hospital for a leg infection that left me unable to walk for almost a month.
3. I recently took in a homeless kitten and named her Frances after Frances McDormand.
4. A year ago today an extremely nice woman I worked with was murdered.
5. Because of Obama's stimulus program, my job is busier than it has EVER been.
6. Spent Sunday morning watching a FOUR hour documentary on the Mormons.
7. I will not eat eggs, potatoes, or seafood.
8. I detest summer and am anxiously awaiting Fall. Dark at 5pm is good.
9. The Atheist stuff is a cover, I'm actually a devout Quaker.
10. Number 9 is a lie.

At least I would die smiling

It would take 17 White Russians to kill me

Created by Bar Stools

...and Wal Mart makes 20 ! !

Now it is an even twenty advertisers that have made the rather wise decision to take their business away from the loony, dangerous, weeping, magic underwear sporting Glenn Beck.

From accusing Obama of eugenics (and weeping) and calling him a racist who hates white people (and weeping), Glenn has gone way past crazytown and right into the area of dangerous incitement of violence.

Sure, he has the right to say whatever woo woo nutter things he can come up with on his show, but that doesn't mean that mainstream advertisers have to support it.

And damn.....when Wal Mart says you are too right wing fringe for them.....then it might be time to step back, take a breath, and ask your masters in Salt Lake what exactly you should do next.



From colorofchange.org

Eight more Glenn Beck advertisers, including Wal-Mart – the world’s largest retailer – have confirmed to ColorOfChange.org that they pulled their ads from the controversial Fox News Channel broadcaster’s eponymous show. Allergan (maker of Restasis), Ally Bank (a unit of GMAC Financial Services), Best Buy, Broadview Security, CVS, Re-Bath, Travelocity and Wal-Mart join the dozen other companies who previously distanced themselves from Beck.

Twenty companies have pulled their ads from Beck’s show in just the last two weeks. The moves come after the Fox News host called President Obama a “racist” who “has a deep-seated hatred for white people” during an appearance on Fox & Friends. Previous companies who pulled their ads include ConAgra, GEICO, Lawyers.com, Men’s Wearhouse, Procter & Gamble, Progressive Insurance, RadioShack, Roche, SC Johnson, Sanofi-Aventis, Sargento, and State Farm Insurance.

Oogah Boogah Woo Woo Wooo!!

Notice the small child watching all of this idiotic behavior as well. Sad and pathetic......yet I'm laughing as I watch. Ugh.

August 16, 2009

Brad Pitt

Excellent interview with Brad Pitt on Real Time. He says that if he were to run for office his platform would be "no religion, gay marriage, and legalization and taxation of marijuana". He now is officially the coolest guy on earth.

August 14, 2009

Silly

Dudeism

Utah is full of assholes

How afraid of gay people can one state be?

Utah was frightened enough to funnel thousands and thousands of dollars into banning same-sex marriage in another state.

And apparently, also frightened enough to reject a wedding announcement in a newspaper.

Is a wedding announcement and a simple picture SO SCARY that the paper feels the need to reject the announcement outright and come up with some silly reasoning for doing so? I guess so.

Way to go Utah. A state known for decades and decades of polygamy making sure that everyone knows that they have "seen the light" on who should be married and who shouldn't. Assholes.


Utah paper rejects same-sex wedding announcement

By JENNIFER DOBNER, Associated Press Writer Jennifer Dobner

SALT LAKE CITY – A southern Utah newspaper has rejected a gay California couple's wedding announcement, saying its policy is to publish announcements only for marriages legal under Utah law.

The Spectrum in St. George initially accepted a paid wedding announcement for Tyler Barrick and Spencer Jones last week, but then changed course, Jones said. The San Francisco couple were legally married June 17, 2008. They wanted the announcement printed in Jones' hometown paper ahead of a family party next week.

Jones, 30, said he initially agreed to the paper's request that the announcement run without a photo, after a clerk told him the publisher feared the picture might make readers uncomfortable. Then Jones changed his mind and appealed to publisher Donnie Welch, asking him to reconsider.

Full story here . . .

August 13, 2009

Astrology

Joe

Jackass of the week....

Doug Manchester cares about the sanctity of marriage. Old white men in dresses in Rome have told Doug what the definition of marriage truly is and Doug has listened. He listened so close that he donated $125,000 of his own money to help ban same sex marriage in California.

Catholics and Mormons working together to deny rights to gay people......isn't religion wonderful?

Now it looks like Doug's OWN marriage is no longer fitting the definition set forth by his church and their imaginary friends......


Protector of traditional marriage Doug Manchester leaving wife of 43 years
By Eric Wolff

In July 2008, hotelier and developer Doug Manchester donated $125,000 to help gather signatures for a proposition that would ban same-sex marriage in California. The early money was crucial to getting the initiative—which ultimately passed—on the ballot. At the time, he told The New York Times that he made the donation because of “my Catholic faith and longtime affiliation with the Catholic Church,” which preferred that marriage remain between a man and a woman. Indeed, the Catholic Church has vehemently opposed gay marriage. Then again, it’s also not too keen on divorce.

On Oct. 9, 2008, Manchester ended 43 years, eight months and nine days of marriage to Elizabeth Manchester by moving out of their La Jolla abode. The couple spent the next several months trying to reach a quiet settlement on how best to distribute millions of dollars in cash and other assets. In July, those talks totally broke down, and Doug started playing financial hardball with Elizabeth, allegedly draining the couple’s shared accounts and stealing her mail.

On Aug. 6, Elizabeth filed a petition for redress in family court. All of the information in this story comes from those petitions. CityBeat contacted attorneys for both parties, but neither returned calls by press time.

Full story here . . .

August 12, 2009

Can't

Faster Pussycat....

Playing Jesus in the Big Lebowski - John Turturro

Bible quote of the week...

"God hates the handicapped" or "Get those crushed testicles away from me"

Leviticus 21:17-21

'No man of your offspring throughout their generations who has a defect shall approach to offer the food of his God. 'For no one who has a defect shall approach: a blind man, or a lame man, or he who has a disfigured face, or any deformed limb, or a man who has a broken foot or broken hand, or a hunchback or a dwarf, or one who has a defect in his eye or eczema or scabs or crushed testicles. No man among the descendants of Aaron the priest who has a defect is to come near to offer the LORD'S offerings by fire; since he has a defect, he shall not come near to offer the food of his God.


Huh?

August 06, 2009

Yes we.....huh what?

Yes-we-cannabis

Color the bridge...

So the West Virginia Department of Transportation has put a page up soliciting the public opinion on what color the ancient Market Street Bridge should be when it gets a face lift later next year. I clicked on through to check out the choices.....and good god....each one is uglier than the one before. Couldn't find the place to click for "all those colors suck ass".

http://www.wva.state.wv.us/wvdot/marketstreetbridge/schemes.aspx

Test Your Faith-Vision

August 05, 2009

Tired?

My new kitten Frances.....showing how to properly pass out after a hard day of chasing toys and destroying furniture.


Jesus forgives all.....right?

Maybe soon, I will see God and Jesus. At least that is what I was told. Eternal life does NOT depend on works. If it did, we will all be in hell. Christ paid for EVERY sin, so how can I or you be judged BY GOD for a sin when the penalty was ALREADY paid. People judge but that does not matter. I was reading the Bible and The Integrity of God beginning yesterday, because soon I will see them. - George Sodini, the man suspected of opening fire in a Pittsburgh-area gym, from his online diary.

Bail out !